why do i put up with this he says? I dont have to sit home, he says. Why can't I just let this go? Is this really love? Or necessity? I dont know... I dont have the burning dependence feeling, its just emotions. I get so hurt, when he just doesn't want to, so I know that those are feelings. Are they gonna go away? The more he hurts me, it seems the more I get sucked in. Its awful. How can someone be loney in a relationship? How can someone be miserably in love?
This isn't the way I envisioned this relationship to turn out. In the beginning he was so simple, so easy. No complications, no hangups, I just had to be myself, and he loved me. Now it seems like I am fighting to get him to love me.
I actually dont do much of anything, I complain a little now and then, buts that it.
Yes, I know, things aren't going to always be peachy king, but you know, after three years, I would hope that he would be more in love with me before. Like I think I am.
Love has to grow, doesnt it? The more you learn and experience someone, the more you are supposed to feel for that person. He has hangups about me, thats cool.
I guess I have to just sit on my hands and wait.
but for how long...?
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